1. “How much are you spending on the wedding?”
So rude. Also, I have no idea.
2. “How many people are you inviting?”
None of your business, especially since this question means you’re off the guest list.
3. “Can I bring my kids?”
I don’t know, now that you’ve put me in this horrifyingly awkward position, I guess you’ll have to!
4. “When are you going to have babies?”
How about you let us plan our wedding before we make a decision about creating human life, mkay?
5. “Are you going to do a prenup?”
Cool question. I’ll have to refer you to the “Mind Your Damn Business” clause of our friendship agreement.
6. “Aren’t you afraid of being stuck with the same person for the rest of your life?”
Um, nope. That’s kind of the whole point.
7. “Are you having a [insert very specific type of wedding that you aren’t planning to have here] wedding?”
No, but it sounds like I know what you’ll be doing for yours! Excited for that one.
8. “Are you changing your name?”
I don’t know, which answer would make you judge me less?
9. “You could always hyphenate it, or combine the names, you know.”
Thank you for this brand-new information, oh wise one.
10. “I could never get married.”
Um, okay then, I guess we’re talking about you now.
11. “You know that most marriages end in divorce, right?”
You know that most conversations end because of this kind of question, right?
12. “I can’t imagine being with the same person for the rest of my life, like, forever.”
Oh, totally!!! Finding your best friend for life suckssss.
13. “How long did it take before they proposed?”
Does that matter?
14. “I’d want to at least be [insert age] before getting married.”
Cool. And I’m super excited to be getting married at this exact age! Isn’t having choices awesome?
15. “Why is a piece of paper so important to you?”
You know what else is a piece of paper? The Declaration of Independence.
16. “Aren’t you afraid of what you’re missing out on, though?”
Nah, pretty sure I’ve won the lottery with what I’ve got, tbh.
17. “Weddings cost so much money, though. Why don’t you buy a house instead?”
While having a house would be amazing, and something we hope for, we wanted to have a wedding and spend our money however we want to. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
18. “How do you know they’re THE ONE?”
They make me laugh? I love being around them? How can you even ask me to pick one answer to this?!
19. “Don’t you ever get sick of each other?”
No fucking way. That’s why we’re getting married.